More finition+8 day week

So after a lovely weekend back in London, it was back into the lab again for more early starts and finition. Originally, my schedule was that I would work Monday to Friday and have Saturdays and Sundays off. However, that all changed when I went to work on Monday as the chef decided to swap me with someone else so I would work Monday and Tuesday, have Wednesday and Thursday off and then Friday through to Friday. Of course, when he asked me about changing days off, I said no problem as long as I could get the last weekend off cos JD was coming to visit me. Then it dawned on me that I would have to work a 8-day week without breaks which was pretty daunting.....

Well, I can finally say that I made it through 2- and 8-day weeks respectively and by the time it got to the end of the day today, it truly felt tough and rough....

Day 1 of 2-day week felt pretty good as I was doing decoration for some new cakes. Came tumbling back down to earth again on Day 2 as I had to work with one of the regulars in the kitchen and basically had her busting my balls all day. OK, she asked me to decorate a certain cake which I had done back in July - when I made the cream for it wrong (yep, cos I'm old and sometimes forget things), she basically threw a mini-tantrum and muttered stuff which essentially translated into, "What the fuck? Didn't you say you had made this before??". Every time she asks me to do something, its generally in muffled tones and when I ask her to repeat what she says, she says it again in a condescending, "you're such a dumb fuck" tone. The stage has been pretty tough at times and the place isn't exactly friendly but I can honestly say, this is the one person in the shop that I truly dislike - really don't know what her problem is?? (The bonus of finishing up in this lab means never seeing her sulky mug again!!)

Days 1 and 2 of 8-day week felt like everything was going from bad to worse......all of a sudden, I wasn't fast enough when filling eclairs so the "2nd in command" took over from me. Not that I really minded, but why do I have to endure being shouted at when he was just as slow as me after he took over?? I also got a bit of a lecture from the chef on how to build one of the most fiddly cakes of the lot, "Surprise". The things which he said were fair enough but I just wish there was a consistent way of teaching people things as I was only told how to make this thing properly, on mmmmm........maybe my 8th time of trying?

Days 3 and 4 of 8-day week improved a bit as I finally got the hang of this "Surprise", worked on a few more new cakes for me and also worked with the regular team members which I get along with better. Days 5 and 6 continued on a similar vein and at one point, there was even a bit of banter in the lab where I was actually included in the conversation?? I even think I heard the "2nd in command" that he wanted to me to work with him for the day, not sure if this was a good thing but decided to see it as a positive thing.....

The chef was off on Day 7 so "2nd in command" was in charge and on the day, gave me things to do which also included a time deadline (dunno why as no other stagiaires have this and I can confidently say I am the fastest out of all of them in this lab). All my cakes were made on time and he said "tres bien" for one and "tres jolie" for another.....nice to hear and secretly, I was pleased with myself for achieving the deadlines (including one which he hadn't even reminded me about), as for the "tres jolie" cake, I knew that anyway without him saying :)

Of course, all good things have to come to an end but even I'm surprised at how pear-shaped everything went on Day 8. The thing that I have the most issue is when people are telling/yelling at me that I've done something wrong when I haven't....today I actually did try to say that it wasn't my fault but all of this fell on deaf ears (cos obviously, I'm a lowly stagiaire). Of course, the girl that I dislike stuck her oar in a couple of times muttering shit about me not tidying up when I actually didn't need to cos we were still using the materials....all she does is criticise which is a bit rich given the fact she is not perfect in the lab.... if that was the case, then maybe I would have a smidgin of respect for her...

I couldn't help but feel mega-frustrated when I asked the chef to double-check what my schedule would be next week. I had been told 3 weeks ago by "formally arsey guy" that he had changed the schedule for me so I could go to the "tour" (section where they make pastry dough and viennosserie) - all of a sudden today, it had changed again and I am working afternoon shift next week. When I asked why this had happened, "2nd in command" didn't have the balls to call "formally arsey guy" again and I was told by him and the chef that this is the way it was.....all I was thinking, why make the big deal of telling me 3 weeks ago that the schedule had been changed for me when it hasn't now at all?


I was also reminded throughout the course of the week about having champagne on the last day of work in the lab (presumably to celebrate) so I did bring a bottle of bubbly this morning but at the end of the shift, no-one mentioned anything so I was left wondering.....what a bloody waste of time, really.....


The metro ride back home after work was filled with mixed emotions, mostly negative......frustration, fucked off, disappointment, helplessness, rejection....all I do every day at my stage is try and do my best and at this point, it feels like its all being thrown back in my face.....its prolly a bit too raw at the moment and hopefully, in a few months time, I will look back at it and put it down to experience. At least, I did leave the metro with one positive thought and I dunno why since I'm not a fan.......if Gordon Ramsay survived working in French kitchens for 3 years, then surely, I can put up with a piddly 3 more weeks? Here's hoping :)